Wake the Lakes “DIMWIT-ZZZ-DUM for the Week” 10-19-23

–Your non-dominant hand has no choice but to get good at clipping fingernails.
–We’re so lucky that flies, ants, and other bugs don’t scream when we kill them.
–The party’s not over until you smile for the mugshot.
–Some people are like clouds, when they disappear, it’s a beautiful day.
–Mirrors don’t lie, and lucky for most of us, they don’t laugh.
–Common sense is a flower that does not grow in everyone’s garden.–We are all time travelers moving at the speed of exactly 60 minutes per hour.
–You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
–If good things come in small packages, then more good things can come in large packages.
–Never agree to plastic surgery if the doctor’s office is full of portraits by Picasso.
–When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas!
–The difference between divorce and legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money.
–Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the HECK alone.
–Ham and Eggs: A day’s work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
–Be careful of your thoughts, they may become words at any moment.
–The best thing about living at the beach is that you only have JERKS on three sides of you.
–Being in a nudist colony probably takes all the fun out of Halloween.