“Wake the Lakes” DIMWIT-ZZZZ-DUMB for the Day” 4-6-23

–Hearing the door lock behind you after you leave someone’s house is a sad sound.
–A mullet actually prevents a “red neck.”
–Jimmy John could’ve been Papa John’s son who went into the sandwich industry to spite his father who cared more about pizza than his son.
–White Castle has no king and Burger King has no castle.
–It is surprisingly difficult to throw away a trash can.
–All screens are touchscreens, but not all are react-screens.
–We never found out where Cotton Eye Joe came from or where he’s going.
–Waking up with one sock is weird if you went to sleep with two, but way weirder if you went to sleep with none.
–The idea that a business won’t survive without good marketing was probably good marketing by marketing businesses marketing the need for marketing.
–Hash Browns are nothing more than socially acceptable breakfast French Fries.
–Maybe the reason we haven’t had any visitors from the future is that we have no future.
–More than a six-pack of beer in the fridge starts to look like a drinking problem, but a whole wine cellar is considered very classy.
–A keychain is a ring invented so that you can lose all of your keys at once.